I've always been on a slightly different road to my friends and family. While I was unemployed and desperately looking for work....they had jobs... forging their future lives. The harder i tried, the worse it got and with my anxiety, panic attacks and social phobia really made life hard - but could i get those same friends to understand? No - it was all " excuses". My temp work - including the fixed long term ones never helped in any way other than it paid the bills. And it really sucked when i loved the job. Then later when I was finally working, my 'friends' had their babies or were so busy a with their lives and were tired of my 'excuses'. Thank God that mental health and well being is more openly spoken about. Then I had my babies and while there was a sleight of hand when it came to my place of employment, I also chose to raise my boys by being there for them. But friends were back at work and not available. Again. Now the boys have grown older, as have I. I've not had paid employment in 21 years....volunteering isn't included. I can barely manage to keep on top of the not so organised chaos and my body is frustratingly against me. It won't let me do what I need to sometimes....a lot of times.
I'm considering a TAFE course....BUT even that is fraught with frustration. I need to have paid employment so I can afford to go to a Dr!
